I wear many hats, as do a lot of us. I function in several roles; howbeit in varying degrees. I am a daughter, sibling, wife, mother, aunt, friend, writer, singer and fashion entrepreneur who has been around for some decades.
I had a rather exciting teenage life. I use the word ‘exciting’ because although I had some very low moments, they did not last too long. For the most part, I was happy.
As I approached my pubescent years, I had the opportunity to interact and work closely with teenagers and adolescents; focusing on self-esteem, parent-child communication issues, Sexuality and Reproductive health matters. I employed arts – music, poetry, writing and drama as tools to inspire confidence, improve self-love and personal development and to encourage positive behavioural lifestyles in the people I was opportune to meet. Though not the beginning of my journey, those times provided clearer, definitive paths; serving as a beacon and pointer to what I am about today.
So yes, I have not always liked some experiences and conditions that I found myself in but I sure have learned from them. For one,
they have helped me to be more self-aware. Secondly, I have grown through them all. Interestingly, writing and music offered my ‘way of escape’. As I often found comfort and strength in journaling – I would speak and write to myself. It was my release and yes, a therapeutic one at that.
I realized that more than anything else, I so wanted to be happy. Many decades after, being happy is still a priority for me. I guard my heart, my thoughts and my actions to ensure that I do not lose sight of this.
Here are but a few of the things I engage in:
- I pause.
- I listen. To my heart, my mind, my body, my spouse, children, environment etc. I run a quick diagnosis of my current state – I tell myself the truth. Being truthful to myself even if it hurts, is kind of my reset button. It allows me to appraise myself, refuel and carry on. At this phase, I accept what is past, recognize what is present and forge on to the future. (i.e. Imagine the best and begin to work towards it)
- This step above, often leads me to this critical next one – I recommit to my values and purpose.
- I do what I love doing – singing, talking to God, writing. The list is not exhaustive but I realized that if all is stripped away, I would likely still be able to do all three of these things. The important thing here is about finding a relaxing activity that fuels you with positivity.
- I stop engaging in whatever makes me unhappy. I cut off on relationships or circumstances that take away from my joy. I discover more exciting ways to continue with those I ought to.
Although I am all about intentional living and inspiring positive change, summarily, I remember that it is important to enjoy my own company and be truly happy with myself first, before extending the same courtesy to others.
How do you keep yourself happy and maintain your inner peace?